Well, April Fools day was a huge success. I won't delve into the gory details, as not to stain your opinion of my character; only that if I ever set foot in Taco Bell territory again, I will be shot on sight and made into soap to clean the foulest, most neglected crevices of one of their putrescent, fetid restrooms. But seriously, if someone just happened to flood their bathrooms, rest assured they deserved it. Okay, it was immature and stupid and completely out of character, but I... oh fuck it, I will not be shamed by this! Haha, no regrets! Fuck, it's great to be honest about this kind of thing (and really easy as well, thanks to the faceless, detatched facade of the internet). Actually I have only one regret... that I had not thought of something wittier than some flooded bathrooms and a mutilated bananna hanging over my friend's porch (lips are sealed on that one, don't ask). One of these years I would like to come up with an insanely elaborate scheme, involving the summoning of Cthulu accompanied a flood of hyper-evolved lemmings.
You know, not to sound self righteous or anything, but I almost feel as if I'm helping people when I pepper their day with a little surrealism. Do you ever have those moments when you just can't think, and nothing makes any sense, so you impulsively ram your noggin into a wall, and suddenly, everyhting clears up? Or when you think your clearest when you're hanging upside down in a tree in a werewolf mask, just listening to the rain fall? Or despite everyone telling you that something won't work, you do it anyway... and you know what? Sometimes they're right, and your endevor has been reduced to scraps, but you take those scraps and use them to create something no one ever expected! It doesn't get much more honest than that. I feel like when you shock someone, or put them face to face with an honest situation, you clear their head and make it easier for them to be honest with themselves.
Sorry, I wasn't expecting to get all soul-searchy like that, but it's gonna happen a lot... so close your assface and deal : )
-Love,
Alex
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